Diary of the unmarried.

I'm not going to pretend it doesn't get to me when I go on Facebook and see my friends post ode worthy write ups dedicated to their better halves and or the "great life" they seem to be living,
or that a knot does not tighten around my chest area when I go out alone and witness couples hand in hand and I catch a glimpse of the pretty not-so-little diamond ring on the ring finger of some of these women and I think "wow, she looks so young".

But despite all of these quasi-envious thoughts, there exists a certain type of joy I feel when I see the faces of mothers proudly exhibiting their infant bundle of joy or beaming with pride when their one year old takes that first step. Or the proud faces of fathers as they survive mummy duty for 5 whole minutes while mom tends to other needs. I look on in admiration (plus a tinge of envy) when I see couples take trips and or announce 8-10 year wedding anniversaries. Couples that barely look 30.

I see pictures of four generations of lovely looking women and I wonder if I'll ever have that.

So in all fairness, all the side, back or straight on When-you-go-marry talk sometimes, does get to me. As much as I try to make it seem like all that talk just ricochets off me, it still leaves a mark. All the calls asking me why and what's happening? Asking why i have to set the bar so high making it seem like I'm doing something wrong and it has to be my fault.

The unshakeable fact is, much as i want to be married yesterday, i will not settle for anything less than being married in every sense of the word. I'm not looking to be married just so as to attain that "married" status quo and secretly hate my better half because me and he have zero in common and i am afraid to talk to him. I want perfection or someone damn close to it.

Ergo, all my well wishers, it is with much love i say i plenty appreciate the wish to see me settled down but i really need a break for a minute here. Besides, who says marriage na my only need right now..You guys can join me to wish for that 2015 Mercedes GL500 seeing as Mr right is taking his sweet time.